04/22/2015

Honest Harm – It’s not just a name

Hello Friends,

I’m overwhelmed at the response I have gotten from the Mother’s Day Giveaway. I’m excited to pick a winner in a few days.  I love all the comments on what you love to give and get for Mother’s Day! Thank you!

Todays post might be a little bit of rambling and journaling for me, but it’s something I wanted to share.

Have you ever wondered where the name, Honest Harm came from? I know it’s a little different and I probably could have used something more “home decor” related, but this name actually means something to me.  I am a very open, honest, raw person.

On the greatest gift you can give yourself:

Source:Buzzfeed

I grew up in a family where we shared openly our feelings and thoughts and I think I grew up thinking everyone was this way.  Then I got married and my husbands family was complete opposite.  We have learned over time to be open with each other and share our feelings, and we have met somewhere in the middle when it comes to sharing and being open with other people.  You see, I have learned that people don’t need to know everything about you all the time.  Now, does this mean I pretend to be someone I’m not or sugar-coat my life?  I don’t think I do that at all.  But I have realized that some things are meant to keep private, or to stay between me and my husband or our little family.  I decided I could be too honest to a fault.  My naive mind felt like I was lying to people if I didn’t share my experiences or feelings.  I have also learned over the years that you can’t trust too many people.  This has been a hard concept for me to grasp.  I am a loyal, trusting person and as I have matured I’ve realized that is not the case for all people.

That being said, I think because I am so open people have worried at times that I couldn’t be trusted with their feelings or experiences they  have been through. I think that has to come over time with friendships and I’ve had to show people that just because I am an open book doesn’t mean I will be about their lives.

We have a group of really amazing friends.  In friends, I mean husband and wife friends.  I think this is such a rare thing to find.  Usually I will meet someone but Mike won’t click with their husband or vice versus.  But about 4 years ago I met a great friend and she introduced to me all of her friends.  We all clicked and had a lot of fun together.  As time went by I got the nickname Honest Harm.  This wasn’t always a positive character trait for me and at first I took a little offense to it.  I guess I say what I am thinking, while others hold back.  I am curious, by nature and I love learning about people.  I am such a people person.  I may ask questions about someone that others maybe wouldn’t ask or tell someone how I feel when others would hold back.  I guess I didn’t realize I did this until I met these friends.  The first few times I was called Honest Harm I came home feeling bad about this character trait I had.  For many months I would try to change this about myself.  I would hold back on conversations or worry what I should or shouldn’t say.  I finally addressed it with my good friend and we had a great conversation about it.  She told me it’s what people love about me.  I’ve always been told that I am so easy to talk to. I am very non-judgemental and I try really hard to be a good listener.  People say they can open up to me and talk to me like they’ve known me forever.  I have come to realize that when you are open and raw with people, they will tend to be the same with you, even if they are generally not that way.  I’ve often been told I should be a therapist because I give great advice.  I don’t know if that is true, but I think because of this “Honest Harm” quality I make people feel that they can open up.

we-need-to-be-as-open-as-possible

Source: Pinterest

I feel like we need more authenticity in this world.  So much of society goes around pretending to be someone they are not.   We may act as if we have more money than we do.  Hang out with friends who don’t quite have the same interest or morals as us, but they’re the “cool” ones.  We may be in a relationship we’re miserable in, but then gush to our friends how amazing it is.  How many times do we see a friend and say life is great, when in actuality our world feels like it is crashing down.  Why do we do this? Why can’t we be real? And raw? Believe me, even Honest Harm, does some of this! As a society we want to be strong and successful and happy.  But the reality is, we can’t be all those things, all the time. I think our biggest strength can be vulnerability.

Ask anyone that knows me and you will know I do not like to say I am getting older.  But I do like to use the term maturing.  Too me, maturing is not about a number or how many gray hairs I have.  Too me, maturing is about wisdom, finding out who we are, discovering our strengths and learning to change our weaknesses.  Maturity to mean shows taking control of our lives and becoming the person we want to be.  We’re strong in our convictions and our beliefs, but we are also willing and open to listen to others and accept them.

The name Honest Harm may have started out a little hard for me to swallow, but as the years have gone by and I have matured, and become stronger in my beliefs about who I am.  I am proud of this name.  I am gratified to know that I can say I have gotten to a place in my life where I can be who I am with no apologies.  And I love to surround myself with people who do the same.  Too me, this shows strength and success.  In fact, Honest Harm is what gave me the power to start this blog and put myself out there.  It’s helped me to not be shy about sharing my talents and to finally say, ya, I am good at interior design, party planning, DIY, all those creative things in my life that I love.

So I challenge you to be a little more real, raw, unapologetic about who are.  It’s your life, live it well.

Found on Huffington Post

Found on Huffington Post

 

Thanks for stopping by today! It really does mean a lot.

Honestly,

Harmony

 

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Comments

  1. Rise Stoldt says:

    Very well said Harmony. All those things are true about you and I should know since I am the mom here. LOL

  2. Becca says:

    You are amazing!! I am so so lucky and blessed to have you for my sister!! I love this post and I love you!!!

Speak Your Mind

*